9/27/2005 11:54:00 AM by Rob

It is wrong to lust after "Ruthie" on 7th Heaven.

First of all, for those of you who are NOT gay, Ruthie has been on the show since she was in kindergarten. How the Camdens managed to have a Jewish-looking child is beyond me, but hey, nobody thought that far ahead, I'm sure. Now, she's 17, but about 4 foot ten, and all she does is pout, but since she's so short, the tiny bit of boobage she DOES have looks real good on her, and...

Never mind, forget I said anything.

I said, forget it...

...by the way, this AIN'T Ruthie. This is Sophia Bush, of whom I've spoke before. The star of WB's "One Tree Hill" is divorcing her co-star, Chad-Michael something, after five blissful months of marriage. Why in the fuck do these people even get up in the morning? It takes a LOT of mental fortitude to stick it out for 22 weeks...I mean, shit, you can go 22 weeks without even experiencing many of the things that make married life great, like, getting yelled at for pee-ing on the toilet seat.

Anyway, she's free, which I guess is The Necessary First Step for her to, I dunno, sleep with one of us. The Necessary Second, Third, and Fourth Steps, of course, I wouldn't know nothing about.

I TOLD you all the cheezcake was going to be kind of scarce for awhile, what with Mrs. Sloth and Mom of Sloth frequently checking me out. Hopefully they'll find other more interesting sites on cruises, nice smelling candles, and jokes about men who pee on toilet seats.

Anyway, in case you forgot, my high school football rantings can be found on the NISB. Thoughtful, useful Cub analysis usually goes on the GROTA site, and whatever else that is swirling around in my brain basin gets pinched out in here.

Notice I reverse-reversed myself yesterday? I took the mea culpa for the Sox' three-game win streak, and then they got beat by Le Tigres? So what happens today? I guess I should praise them to the heavens for their pitching, small-ball and other intangibles, and secretly hope they lose. But you CAN'T fool Karma, it knows when you are being facetious, it knows when you're trying to finesse fate. It won't let you.

Anyway, my fearless prediction for today, is that the Cubs split with the Battlin' Buccos, and go into Houston 2 under .500, where they have spent the last six weeks. Maddux wins his, and the offense supports Prior in their usual and customary way, with a measly run on 4 hits.

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