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Bruce, we gave you tha keys, and THIS is what you brought home?

¿Dónde está mi dinero, las rameras?

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Wednesday, April 6

Yesterday's loss

So he gave up two dongs to the Corpse of Luis Gonzalez, probably the only two homers he'll hit all year. He left after five innings, subjecting the bullpen to a full day's work for a second straight day. He knows as much about pitching as anyone alive, and he knows that he has come out the last three Aprils and stunk out the joint, but he seemingly cannot solve his own riddle.

Am I going to give Greg Maddux a pass?

Hell, yes. He's Greg Maddux, for fuck's sake.

I just wish the hitters could have done the same thing yesterday as they did Monday. They should have to do fifty pushups for every pop fly, like Willie Mays Hays in "Major League". Right there, in the batters box. Down and hard, tard-licks!
Down and hard!!! Starting with YOU, Mr. Corey Patterson.