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Bruce, we gave you tha keys, and THIS is what you brought home?

¿Dónde está mi dinero, las rameras?

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Friday, April 29

Special treat

Ain't often you have a couple of 300-game winners facing a matter of fact, once Maddux and Jolly Roger hang 'em up, you might not ever see ONE 300-game winner again, let alone two in the same game.

I believe in the late 80's, you had Don Sutton, Tom Seaver, Steve Carlton, and Gaylord Perry lurking about at the same time. Sutton was the common denominator, for Seaver never faced Carlton or Perry, and Carlton never faced Perry, once they were in the 300 club.

Before that, you had to go back to the Pud Galvin days to find the last hook-up.

Maybe in the next 15 years or so, medical science will advance to the point where rotator cuffs and ulnar ligaments can be patched up with a minimum degree of pain and a maximum degree of effectiveness. Or maybe two freaks of nature, like these two, will come along again. Some say that the money is so good, that there is no incentive for a man to ever pitch this long again, but that's bullshit, since these two have been making top dollar all along, and it didn't stop them.

They may get together later this year, and who knows if either will come back for more fun in 2006. But tonight is one for the books, kids, so enjoy.

The key here isn't so much the 'W' tonight, because, frankly, since Fat Roger came home, he's just been sick with it. I've never heard of an 0.32 ERA before...ever...? What I want out of Maddux tonight is INNINGS!! The bullpen looks like the Texans at the Alamo, right before Santa Ana's troops stormed the walls and made all them cowboys suck their dicks. They need a break, they need a quiet night where they all can dress funny, light matches between guys' toes, and talk about the longest steamers they ever laid down.

We don't need to see Roberto Novoa or Will Ohman again tonight, I think we all can agree.