4/01/2005 01:58:00 PM by Rob

Obviously, a big weekend

On Monday, the Cubs start out yet again to earn that elusive National League Pennant, but their ultimate game of the year is still far far away, whereas the he-man stud dawgs University of Illinois Fighting Illini have a big old barn dance starting tomorrow, and hopefully lasting until late Monday night.

If you are not an Illini fan, in fact, if you are not a close relative of Rick Pitino, please let me impress on you some facts about the coach of the dogmeat Louisville Cardinals:

- He went to a Final Four with Providence (?!?) and used it as leverage to take over the New York Knicks.
- He ran the Knicks into the ground.
- Leaving in disgrace, he surfaced at Kentucky, and went to a Final Four with them. Hell, I think he won the whole thing. Anyway, he used it as leverage to take over the Boston Celtics.
- He ran the Celtics into the ground.
- Leaving in disgrace, he surfaced in Louisville, and has taken his team to a Final Four.

Do you REALLY want Rick Pitino to win any more games this year, then use it as leverage to obtain a GM/Coach position in the pros again? Do you really want to see him destroy, say, Dallas, the Lakers or the Wizards? He's had two other chances to become a college-level legend, like Coach K, the General, and Dean Smith (nobody can be John Wooden. Forget about it) and he's pissed them both away, spurning the college ranks like an old hometown honey for a taller, thinner, richer model from the city.

Lose, adulterer!! Die like a stuck pig, you filthy philanderer! Drafter of busts, sawed off pipsqueak Napoleononic crapstick!!

God is wearing Orange this weekend, and the Pope can't wait to get up there to watch the game with Him in Super Maximum HD...they won't have it HERE for years!!

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