4/13/2005 11:07:00 AM by Rob

Fearless Predictions, part XXVII

...where the Uncouth Sloth holds his crystal balls and sees the future..

To yer left is the delectable, blonde (and all it implies) Miss Oklahoma 2005, Laci Scott. I must confess that I did NOT sit through the whole Miss USA pageant the other night. (Miss USA, the glossier, sluttier cousin of Miss America). But I WAS treated to some of her work on the Miss USA Fear Factor prior to the pageant.

She registered high on the Unintentional Comedy Scale with gems such as these: As Joe Rogan was demonstrating how contestants will be subjected to 50 gallons of "fish oil" being dumped on them, Laci asked "What's fish oil?" One of the other budding rocket scientists replied "Oil, from a fish." Not to be quieted, Laci continues: "I didn't know fish had oil".

But, sweetie, America already has Jessica Simpson. We full up with dumb bunnies.

The thing I noticed, outside of her girlish charm and her almost undescribable naivete, is that she is barely 18 years old...all the other contestants were in their 20's, some old as 26 or 27. Seems that this is almost a career path for some of these "misses", some of which have nearly a decade of experience competing in their local, state, and national pageants.

While it IS conceivable that she may decide to stick with it, and with years of wisdom finally win the crown. My crystal balls don't think so.

They think little Laci is going to be our next Porn Queen. Sweeet!!

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