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Tuesday, August 24

This is HIS house

In 2002, The Great Sammy Sosa welcomed himself upon arrival at spring training, declaring to everyone present "welcome to my house".

In 2004, Carlos Zambrano has informed one and all that "Wrigley Field is HIS house".

Frankly, I have more faith that Carlos might actually do something better with it. Maybe add a few more decorations, such as banners, pennants, and flags.

On nights like last night, it just looks so easy. Keep the ball down, down, down, make them ground it to short, to second, pitch it, scoop it, throw 'em out. I guess he can't do it every time, which is a shame. For when Z is on, like last night, it really just looks so easy. Prior makes people chase, Wood blows people away, Maddux lulls you to sleep, Clement nibbles, nibbles, nibbles. Z will just make you pound your shit into the ground, and make you LIKE it.

I am trying hard, very hard, to be rational about Nomar and his wrist. If he goes on the DL, he can start as of the 21st, which will free him up around the 5th or 6th of September, which leaves plenty of time for the end-of-season-Sherman's March on Atlanta, where we set fire to everything and everyone we pass by, ending with a first-series NLDS win in Turner Field.

How's that for a run-on-and-on sentence?

Missed much of the Olympics yesterday. Zambrano's Dad, a frequent commenter here, has been touting the praises of Pocket Rocket Aussie diver Loudy Tourky. Since I would rather claw my eyes out than watch diving, I can't say I can comment on the cut of her jib, and the big wide web hasn't been much help, either. She's Jewish, which means she isn't blond, thank God. No more bleach blonds, pleeze? She's also 4'10" and 90 pounds, and shock of shocks, she's a former gymnast, who, I dunno, got too old? She grew boobies?

I assume Dad knows of which he speaks, but the idea of the Uncouth Sloth trying to hook male-to-female 1-pin connectors with someone a third my size...damn, girl, broke ya in two. Guess I can share ya with a couple of my friends.

If I had a couple.