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Wednesday, January 25

Since Hendry is on vacation, I'm gonna write a joke

Ron Artest, Isiah Thomas and Chris Penn walk into a bar.

The bartender is a somewhat attractive woman who immediately announces "I have an MBA and I am a vice president of marketing. I only do this to pay the extra charges on my Blackberry bill. What will you have?"

Ron says that he has to meet with his bosses about 'some shit' later, so he will have a Sprite. Isiah asks for a Miller Lite in a plastic cup. Chris orders a shot of vodka.

The bartender pours the soda and the beer, and as she starts to pour the vodka, Chris swipes the bottle out of her hand and chugs it until he passes out and dies.

Isiah shouts at the woman, "You stupid bitch! Why the hell did you let him do that? You know what you need? Me! I'm in love with you. Let me squeeze your titties!"

The woman stares at him and screams "That's harrassment!"

Isiah says "I can't get no love from you today? I fucked over the CBA, the Indiana Pacers, and the New York Knicks. I'll fuck you over, too. Now get down here and suck my cock, that's all you ho's are good for."

Ron-Ron jumps up and gets in Isiah's grill and says in a low voice "You shouldn't talk to the woman like that."

Isiah then throws his beer cup into Ron-Ron's face. Artest then rips Isiah's left leg off at the knee, beats the rest of him to death, along with Ben Wallace's brother and a cameraman from WGN-TV. He then fishes a plane ticket to Sacramento out of his pocket and rips it to shreds, pulls on the front of his jacket, and yells "Queens Represent!"

Then a fruit bat flies into the bar and dumps right on top of Ron's head.

The bartender laughs. "Ha. They were right, son. You ARE batshit crazy!"

Ahh, I know it sucked. I'll go back to sleep now. ZZZZzzzzzzzzzz......

BTW: Chuck's cousin is an assistant coroner in Santa Monica, and he is helping with the Chris Penn autopsy.