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Bruce, we gave you tha keys, and THIS is what you brought home?

¿Dónde está mi dinero, las rameras?

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Friday, October 22

Small town Illinois football

I'm a stinky-ass traitor, according to my wife.

My son's team is 6-2 going into tonight's game, their conference schedule is over, they have already qualified for the playoffs, so whether they win or lose is of little consequence.

On the other hand, my alma mater, the noble Coal City Coalers are going up against the fuckhead inbreeding Wilmington Wildcats.

Both teams are 8-0. Coal City is ranked #1 in class 4A. Wilmington is #1 in class 3A. We beat their ass frequently in the early-to-mid nineties, but since 1996 or so, they've had a nice string of 1-A college talent come through there, including current Arizona Cardinal and former Northwestern star Damien Anderson, and their fans have been just short of crude ever since.

For a point of reference, think Ligue-grade Sux fans, only they get to back a winner, with a little of the Billy Bob Thornton character in "sling Blade" thrown in.

Even though Coaltown is the ranking team in a higher attendance bracket, Wilmington is heavily favored at home. Over 6,000 extras from the movie "Deliverance" will be in River City tonight...gonna be fun, no matter what.

I'll be the one drinking the cinnamint schnapps.