It started out as a Cub blog with cuss words. I'm still cussin'; it's the Cub part I'm a little squishy on these days.

The Sloth is not intended for younger or sensitive readers!

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Bruce, we gave you tha keys, and THIS is what you brought home?

¿Dónde está mi dinero, las rameras?

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Wednesday, September 1

It's up to me to find the good news out there

First of all. I know SOMETHING that would make me happy...

Yeah, yeah, oh yeah.

Let's see, what else is good out there?

Indians 22, Yankees 0?

That's good. Real good.

Maria Sharapova in the U.S. Open is a good thing.

Yeah, I'm REALLY reaching if I'm bringing tennis into the mix.

I'm trying to avoid speaking the unspeakable, prolonging the inevitable, as it pertains to our post-season hopes.

For, if we were to contend for the post-season, we are going to need more than a one-dimensional offense. If we hit homers, we win. If we don't, we don't score. This is not allowing the offense to keep the opposing pitchers honest. If I were managing a team facing the Cubs, I wouldn't throw them a fastball the whole rest of the year. I would force them to beat me with a walk...with small ball.

Don't blame Hendry, for he has stocked the team (expect for the 800-pound ape) with players renowned for making hard contact. But under the Dusty Baker/Sarge Matthews plan, they just swing from their jocks, and let the chips fall where they may.

For, if we were to contend for the post-season, we are going to run into some pressure-packed situations where we are up by one run in the ninth inning, and we will have need to rely on a man who can get those last three outs. Here, management HAS failed you, for it relied on Joe Borowski to recover, and he hasn't, and their backup plan was to call on elite set-up man LaTroy Hawkins, and he hasn't been successful.

For, if we were to contend for the post-season, we will only need four starters, and the fifth starter would serve an important role as long man and innings eater, as a stop-gap measure to avoid burning out the bullpen. Logic would dictate that you would keep your four most effective starters in the rotation; not the most decorated starters; not the ones with the biggest reputation; not the ones with the brightest future, but the four hottest starters NOW.

Therefore, if we were to be totally honest about the process, if I had to choose four starters NOW to pitch for me, I would take Maddux.

And Zambrano. And Clement. And Wood.

Leaving...Mark Prior to work the postseason out of the pen.

I guess he has about a month to prove otherwise.

One more for da road...