4/28/2004 02:21:00 PM by Rob

Roster issues

There has been some stated interest in what I, the Uncouth Sloth, think about what appears to be some upcoming roster issues.

What to do when Grud is healthy?
What to do when Prior is healthy?
What to do when Ryan Dempster is healthy?
What to do when Angel Guzman is healthy?
What to do when Mike Remlinger is healthy?

I have listed these in order from hardest to easiest decisions.

When Remlinger is healthy, Mike Wuertz is sent down, down, down, as far as he can be sent. Off the club, off the roster, off of everything that currently has his name on it.

When Guzman is healthy, he is to be sent to Iowa. Unless either Wood, Zambrano, or Clement is hurt.

When Dempster is healthy, he is to take the Long Rehab Tour, and when he is finally ready for Big Town, I'm sure there will be a reliever with a touchy groin, a sore elbow, or a raging case of throat herpes.

When Prior is healthy, Sergio Meat Tray should be relocated so far away, the only place where you will be able to see his miserable haircut is on a milk carton.

Which brings us to Mark the Grud.

He started well, Walker has continued well. All the pre-season talk about how these two can co-exist is pretty much mulch. I do NOT want one of them festering on the bench, or being Bellhorned around the field, bitching to the media, fucking up the clubhouse.

In a world where the Yankees are struggling, and they only lack "name" players at one spot - 2B - there has never been a better time to trade with them. I myself would keep Walker; conversely, Walker will be the first name Brian Cashman drops. I really like the left-handed bat. Otherwise, I really don't care WHICH guy stays home, as long as the other goes.

I am willing to do whatever it takes to keep things as light and cheery as possible. We are currently staffed with 12 pitchers: one could go down if/when Grud is healthy. I, myself, like having the extra capacity in my pen. I also like not having to worry if I am hurting anybuddy's wittle feewings if I don't play them every day. I like my starters to be studs, my reserves to know their role, and my arms to be as fresh as possible.

So, in the name of Grud, I say Trade.

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