2/25/2004 11:36:00 AM by Rob

From the ridiculous to the sublime

In increasing order of importance:

1) The Bartman Ball. Every Cub story today in the "legit" press starts with this non-story. Who cares? I believe in the Curse, and I know enough to know that the manager of Haray Caray's steakhouse is not empowered to lift it. Hell, his late lamented boss tried himself, here (b4 1998) and in the hereafter (1998), and failed.

2) John Webb. Broke his leg "tripping on his dog". Got placed on waivers, where he was claimed by the Devil Rays. Cubs did not rescind waivers. This doesn't seem right to me, at first glance.

Wonder if it was the same dog that tripped Brian Griese, Mad Dog (20/20) or Red Dog, maybe?

3) Sosa. Some of the Army claim he is much smaller than last year. He's smaller than the 1999-2002 version. But it's a wash compared to 2003.

He claims Meester Bond can have all the records, he just wants a Worl Seeries. OK, Sam. That's good, but I wish I could believe ANYTHING that comes out of YOUR mouth.

4) Steroids, I still hate 'em. Always have, on principle. But I realized something today: I got more comments from yesterday's blog than I ever have b4. Also, I realized something else, that Tha Notorious BST and Ivy Chat helped me realize:

What I hate the most about Steroids is all the complaining about them.

Yes, our fearless Commander in Chief made a point to reference them during his latest SOTU address. I was sort of impressed about it at first, but my impression has eroded greatly after he has decided that we need an Amendment to the freakin' Constitution to keep Gay people from marrying.

BST points out that Dubya is part of a growing number of Rich White People who lost their Souls in pursuit of Money, and now are trying to regain their lost Souls by immersing themselves in Religion. New Religion. And oh, as BST would say, I HATES me some Religion. Religion is the single most destructive thing man ever invented.

Religion segregates, separates, put people on pedestals, installs some in positions of power over others. It has kept people down, served as the basis of nearly every war ever fought, as well as the basis of some of the worst scams perpetrated upon mankind.

New Religion is behind the rampant Homophobia that is making a spaghetti noodle mess of this year's political race. New Religion is behind filthy rich Mel Gibson's decision to make a gruesomely violent movie about the Son of God, and it's behind everyone's panting desire to see it. And New Religion is behind the inordinate outcry about Steroids in sports.

The Baby Boomers are realizing that they could start dropping dead any day now, so they have decided that they better stop pursuing the excesses of the 80s and 90s, and start cloaking themselves in New Morality. And that includes bitching about unfair drug usage in sports.

I feel cheap and dirty that I have aligned myself with these filthy trunk-fucking hypocrites.

I would do anything, or support anything, that would SHUT these mothersucking Pollyannas all the way the fuck UP!

But, Stew, I still hate the Players Union. Sorry.

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