It started out as a Cub blog with cuss words. I'm still cussin'; it's the Cub part I'm a little squishy on these days.
![]() Illini Basketball Bruce, we gave you tha keys, and THIS is what you brought home? ![]() ¿Dónde está mi dinero, las rameras?
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Wednesday, December 10
12/10/2003 10:22:00 AM
by Rob
The one year anniversary also features the longest headline. Sorry. In case you haven't heard, there is some smoke-n-sizzle for us today: KSAZ-TV in Phoenix, Arizona leaked word that the Cubs and free agent catcher Ivan Rodriguez were closing in on a deal. CubsTalk has since learned from sources that a deal for Rodriguez is on the table and could be finalized soon. Of course, the Bugler, the morning talk show host was just besides himself imagining a lineup that looks like this: 2B Grud C Pudge 1B Lee RF Sofa LF Alou CF Patterson 3B Ramirez SS AGon P Stud-du-Jour See, I got issues, starting with the notion that Sammy Ego-fuck Sosa is going to agree to drop in the order? Really? Since when? Ramirez 7th, when Patterson is 6th? Lee third? When did HE become Lord of OPS? And Pudge 2nd? The Fish themselves had him fifth, I believe, until he went apeshit in the playoffs, so they took advantage by moving him up. Doesn't the second hitter have to sacrifice himself sometime in terms of moving the leadoff runner around? Maybe this won't be an issue, since Grud isn't a leadoff hitter. He isn't gonna walk, run, bunt, etc, like good leadoff men do. Maybe we'll just pretend that we WON'T have a leadoff hitter, so we'll treat Grud like a 2 hitter, Pudge like a '3', Lee like a '4'...down to Gonzalez as our ninth hitter, and the pitcher will be just a real shitty DH? Anyway...I'm putting the cart b4 the horse, MegaBigTime!! The main thing is that my raw smelly asshole is burning right now, from all the Pudge smoke that they're blowing. I hope Hendry gots the big ol' Zimmer-sized tube of Prep H....
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