8/15/2003 03:05:00 PM by Rob

Winning despite front office efforts

Why do you send down Juan Cruz while keeping both Estes and Alfucksucka? Oh, yeah, contracts. That's right. Make decisions based on money rather than on winning.

Why do you keep Troy O'Leary when he couldn't get on base against the third-string relief pitcher from Harvey Milk High School's JV team? Couldn't we try Dave Kelton a little bit longer, to see if he is the truth or not?

I know we got him for almost nothing, but the answer that "Who is Aramis Ramirez?" is probably the question to is "He was the first Latin to play third base in the big leagues with two left feet, attached to the ends of his arms."

Of course, we all know the first player of any nationality who played 3B in the bigs with feet attached to his arms was a Cub. Probably Keith Moreland, who also suffered from having a 75 pound cannonball permanently stuck up his ass.

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